the cost

Last night I decided to start reading “God in a Brothel” by Daniel Walker again. Post Thailand everything just seems different. I was reading Walker’s words about how he would have run in the opposite direction when he stepped up to fight for freedom if he knew then what he knew now. I couldn’t help but relate. I wept at the end of chapter three. Just thinking of how hard it really is and the big picture of what I am getting myself into. I’m sad to share my friend that I wrote about yesterday who was left for dead with her throat slit passed away. I’m thankful she is in Heaven. And if you don’t think God loves the prostitute (or prostituted) let’s have coffee. I’m thankful that she is no longer going to be disrespected. I’m thankful that she is resting in eternal glory and being lavished with the love she so desperately searched for here on earth. I’m thankful she no longer knows the hell she lived in while on earth. I’m thankful that God is wiping away the tears from her eyes and telling her how loved she is. I’m thankful that Heaven is real.

I never really thought about how hard it would be… I knew that my heart broke for injustice but the sorrow and despair I would endure on account for the broken was not something I envisioned in this walk. I’m thankful I know what it is to hurt for God’s people and I’m thankful I had the opportunity to pray with my sweet sister the weeks leading up to her reunion with Christ. I sat in my bed last night and asked God if I really knew what I was getting myself into. Did I really understand all that encompassed saying ‘yes’? Do I truly grasp the hurt of these streets? Am I strong enough to sit down and have conversations and hear about the horror innocent women are enduring? Is He sure He called the right person? And the answer to all of that is –yes-. God is stronger. God is greater. He that is in me is greater than he that is in this world. I refuse to be like the one who knows about the evil and yet does nothing.

Human Trafficking is real. It is hell on earth. And for some crazy reason I want to continue fighting for freedom because I know that God’s love is worth sharing and that these precious souls who are trapped are worthy of FREEDOM. I woke up this morning with a fight still in me. I am reminded that no matter how hard, how difficult, how painful, how tragic this fight is…… the cost is worth it. I am reminded of my decision to follow Christ Jesus and similar to His love for me…..that decision is unconditional.